Sunday, April 20, 2008!
HandWritten on; 10:49 PM
i went back to Nanyang yesterday to watch A Hatful of Stars II. it was very very touching, especially especially the first video where we can see ourselves in, when it was OUR hat full of stars :) suddenly allllll the memories come flooding back, the song was super apt, "It's All Coming Back to Me Now" i suddenly recall how we prepared for hfos, how we stayed back in school till super super late, how we practised, how we danced, how we went allll the way to changi hospital to prac amazonic cause it was a sunday and the school wasnt open and there were no venues. everything everything, so much so much. MR RAJ!!!! i never dared to talk to him when we were still in nanyang, it feels cool yet surreal how the 3 of us can joke around and laugh at him, with him yesterday night when we passed him the board from us. :D im really super grateful to him. come to think of it, he was the one who made our batch so bonded. and just like what i wrote in the note to him, mr raj, "thanks for teaching us the meaning of dance, and making us the people we are today" :)
i haven felt like this for a very long time. i haven missed nanyang for a very long time. cause i think hwachong kinda felt more like a home to me now. but yesterday when we went back to that building, when we went back to the STUDIO, i seriously seriously MISSED NANYANG and i felt like going back. when nothing was too complicated, when studying isnt so hard, when everything is much simpler and happier, when life still did not start to suck. haha. nymd used to mean the world to me, and as time passed the feeling sort of faded. i admit, there were times when i thought of the times in nanyang i wonder why and how i could have loved nymd soooo much. and last week when i went back, while everyone felt like being back there, i felt scared that the past 1 year and 4 months would actually just be a dream and i would be back in nanyang again and that feeling was just weird. but yesterday i felt it again, the passion for nymd :) nymd, where i truly danced for the first time. nymd, mr raj's "grandfather talks" (quoting jiayi) and his many many valuable lessons; nymd, how we knocked it down during dance camp; nymd, how we had our very first dance production having our debut in front of the whole school; nymd, how we are the dancers and we create the dreams. yesterday, i felt it again, how much how much nymd means to me. :)
we went back a few times last year, they were truly countable cause there werent that many, but i realised we haven taken off our shoes and went down to the dance floor for 1 year and 4 months. yesterday when we went down there again, jiayi meisiew and i, and xianhuan huitian. 3 modern dancers, 2 chinese dancers, we were reminded once again of the times when we were practising down there, how we stretched with the bars, how the hexagonal dance studio lets us see ourselves everywhere :) looking up when you're at the dance floor feels different, and nostalgic. that was when i wanted the past 1 year 4 months to be a dream and i wanted to be back there again. i read my blog archive like during dec 06, i said "i hope that one day i can love mad as much as i love nymd". and for a rather long time, i thought that i have actually grew to love mad MORE than nymd. but after yesterday i realised, hahaha, i love both, but in different ways. its just a very different feeling. mad makes me feel more ..in reality. nymd makes me feel more like i'm in a dream, especially during hfos. hahaha. both has given me SO much. haha, see what dance do to us :)
the very nice and meaningful present we got for him and he was so touched! :D its such a pity only the 3 of us could make it yesterday night :(
FINALE: THE instructor. :D 1 year ago if you tell me to take a photograph with him i could have died from fear, HAHA
